So, I'm trying to set up my blog so that only certain people can see it... I'm not sure if I've done it right, so this post is a test.
PS the title is totally a reference to the musical Rent, in case you didn't catch that =P
Update: Woohoo it worked! =D Also, if I've sent your invite to the wrong email addy (and you're viewing this with that wrong email addy), leave me a comment or send me an email (margnis@hotmail.com) with the email you want to view this with. Thanks! =)
Friday, October 21, 2011
Thursday, October 20, 2011
BAM!
Internet has arrived! Thank you, Shaw technician man! =D
Expect more blog posts more often, yay! =D
Expect more blog posts more often, yay! =D
Monday, October 17, 2011
I Feel
Broken.
Torn.
Hurt.
Confused.
Angry. At everything and yet at nothing at all.
Scared.
Closed in.
Trapped.
Alone. Even surrounded by people.
Small.
Insignificant.
I know these are not true, but it's how I'm feeling. I'm recognising that I'm getting to a low point again, I've been trying really hard these past couple weeks to fight it, but I'm getting tired.
People keep telling me to give it up to God. I do! The problem is, I snatch it back. It's such a struggle to leave it in His hands...
I've done so much baking this past weekend, I had to use up my pumpkin, but I also had to keep myself busy and distracted. I always do that... I'm afraid to face my storms cuz I'm afraid that I will get lost in them.
I want to be very clear on this right now. I have not intentionally hurt myself, nor do I plan to. Thoughts are there, yes, but I do not want to put them into action. But in saying that, I can definitely understand why cutters cut, I imagine it would be a big release. I say it again: I am not going to intentionally hurt myself.
Please pray for me... I'm not willing to share publicly yet, but there is a lot happening in my world right now, it's really hard to process it and deal with it all at once... I know that I will have better days, I just gotta get past these harder days first...
Torn.
Hurt.
Confused.
Angry. At everything and yet at nothing at all.
Scared.
Closed in.
Trapped.
Alone. Even surrounded by people.
Small.
Insignificant.
I know these are not true, but it's how I'm feeling. I'm recognising that I'm getting to a low point again, I've been trying really hard these past couple weeks to fight it, but I'm getting tired.
People keep telling me to give it up to God. I do! The problem is, I snatch it back. It's such a struggle to leave it in His hands...
I've done so much baking this past weekend, I had to use up my pumpkin, but I also had to keep myself busy and distracted. I always do that... I'm afraid to face my storms cuz I'm afraid that I will get lost in them.
I want to be very clear on this right now. I have not intentionally hurt myself, nor do I plan to. Thoughts are there, yes, but I do not want to put them into action. But in saying that, I can definitely understand why cutters cut, I imagine it would be a big release. I say it again: I am not going to intentionally hurt myself.
Please pray for me... I'm not willing to share publicly yet, but there is a lot happening in my world right now, it's really hard to process it and deal with it all at once... I know that I will have better days, I just gotta get past these harder days first...
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Quick Post!
No I don't have internet yet, yes I am doing this from my phone, but this is because I'm super excited about it and wanted to share! :) This morning I performed a solo at my church for the offering, which was totally last minute, but worked out perfectly!
The song is called "What Do I Know of Holy" by Addison Road, and it's a song that's been really speaking to me this past week, and so I needed to learn how to play it, which I did. Then when I got to church, Karen (who was leading worship cuz the Butlers were at CFOT with the Hickmans for their welcome weekend service) mentioned that she didn't have a song picked out for the offering so we would just do one of the other songs again, unless I had something about holiness. So, of course, I mentioned this song that God had laid on my heart this week, and ta-da! We had a song for offering. So here it is :) it's not perfect, but I was nervous :P
The song is called "What Do I Know of Holy" by Addison Road, and it's a song that's been really speaking to me this past week, and so I needed to learn how to play it, which I did. Then when I got to church, Karen (who was leading worship cuz the Butlers were at CFOT with the Hickmans for their welcome weekend service) mentioned that she didn't have a song picked out for the offering so we would just do one of the other songs again, unless I had something about holiness. So, of course, I mentioned this song that God had laid on my heart this week, and ta-da! We had a song for offering. So here it is :) it's not perfect, but I was nervous :P
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Sorry...
I know I haven't posted in a while, but I currently have no internet at home, and it's such a pain to post via my phone... Takes a while, especially if I have lots to write. So hopefully soon I'll get a chance to post a nice big update for y'all, and share some new recipes! :)
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