Sunday, January 31, 2010

A Whole Week Gone Already?!?!?!?

Wow, sorry for not updating all week, it's been another long one!!! Between the two jobs, I had 42 hours for the week, whew that's a lot!!! Gonna be a nice paycheque, but I'm not sure if it was worth it... I ended up with a pretty good head cold this weekend without a chance to actually slow down and rest, not good... I'm hoping it doesn't hit me superly hard tomorrow, cuz I have an 8-hour shift at the daycare that I'm not wanting to give up! =( I suppose if I have to then I'll have to, but we'll just see how I feel in the morning =)

So, on to this week's meal schedule! I've decided to just put dinners, since breakfast is always just cereal anyways, except Saturdays when I actually make a big breakfast =P Here it is:

Monday - Left over spaghetti and sauce
Tuesday - Roasted vegetable lasagna
Wednesday - Pizza Pops
Thursday - Possibly going to Mongo's! =D
Friday - Eat @ work
Saturday - Eat @ work
Sunday - Left-over lasagna

I'd blog more, but I'm pretty tired, and I wanna get some sleep so I hopefully feel better in the morning... =)

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Meal Planning!

Here's this week's plan:

Monday:
-Cheerios
-Leftovers for lunch and dinner

Tuesday:
-Cheerios
-Spaghetti and home-made sauce

Wednesday:
-Life
-Pizza Pops

Thursday:
-Life
-eat @ work

Friday:
-Cheerios
-eat @ work

Saturday:
-waffles or pancakes
-eat @ work

Sunday:
-Cheerios
-roasted vegetable lasagna from Superstore (SOOOOO yummy, looking forward to it! =D)

Today I made the spaghetti and sauce. Stopped at Safeway on the way home from the daycare to get some canned diced tomatoes (they ended up being on sale, 2/$4 for the bigger cans woohoo!) and mushrooms. The way I cooked it was I put one can in a frying pan and heated it while I cut up my veggies... I had red yellow and green peppers (about half of each), half a red onion, and the mushrooms I bought, cuz those just HAVE to be fresh - not canned - when they're going into a home-made sauce!!! =D And I put some Mrs. Dash and some of Christina's Garlic Plus stuff she has (she was home and let me have some, thanks!!!) And of course, as I was making the sauce, I had the spaghetti cooking too...

Oh my word, I LOVE making home-made spaghetti sauce!!! I love having tomato chunks and fresh veggies, rather than just the jarred sauce... I'd even rather have spaghetti with some butter and spices rather than jarred sauce... But home-made, oh my gosh!!! And it was so colourful, which just adds to it! =) I was chatting with Christina tonight too about eating healthy, and we both agree that when we actually have enough time to cook healthy meals like this, we can make it how ever we want, and it makes it fun! Yes, cooking can be fun! Haha but this is coming from a girl who LOVES cooking! ...when she has the time... =P

So anyways, here's a picture of my dinner from tonight, thought I'd share it with you all! Go ahead, try it yourself this week!!! =)



Sunday, January 24, 2010

This Past Week...

Has been tough! My goodness I thought it would never end! Can't say it was all bad, there were definitely some highlights =) Major one? Pool night, I won 3 out of 4 games, ending with a 36, 4 points away from a perfect night! And I'm the girl who usually just makes it past 20... =P And working at the daycare, oh my gosh those kids pretty much make my life!!! =) There's not a day that goes by when I don't get one of those "THIS is why I'm in this!" moments! Whether it's a tackle hug, or being told I'm a great story-teller, or even having a one-on-one conversation about what Jesus means to them... Man, those kids have so much faith, no wonder Jesus tells us to become like little children!!! Blind faith... Hmmmm.....

Anyways, on to what I wanted to blog about... Forgive me, I'm finding it hard to find words to share what's going on in me... Right at this moment, I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed, exhausted, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually... Bleh... Part of the problem is working two jobs... Between the two, I'm not quite doing 40 hours a week, but the hours I AM doing is spread over 7 days a week. The daycare is Monday-Friday, and Saturdays and Sundays (plus some evenings during the week) I'm working at Smitty's. It is so tiring! What made it worse this week was that there was always company over almost every night... Monday the kids were here, Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday Luke was here, last night was Debby's singles group from her church, tonight I don't even know what group was here but they were Debby's friends... Wednesday I was out at pool so by the time I got home everyone was in bed... It's hard being on the go all day, then coming home and not being able to fully rest... By Friday, I was just so frustrated with people being here everyday, I was ready to cry! I did actually, after everyone had gone to bed, I sat in my room and just lied on my bed and let the tears come out...

And of course, when Stacey gets this exhausted, her mind tends to revert back to old ways of thinking... Not good... Though please be assured nothing drastic has come up, but my fear is that if things keep going this way, things will get bad...

Okay, time to be super up front with y'all... (haha I said "y'all"...) I'm not afraid to admit this anymore, I've already blogged about it a while back... I used to be suicidal. I'm not anymore, I have no intention or desire to hurt myself, so please don't get all worried... =) The problem is that those voices (no I'm not crazy, everyone has voices in their head...) don't actually away. To be honest, I do believe in demons, in the same way I believe in angels. And I believe that those negative voices I hear are those demons sent to attack me while I'm weak. This is a spiritual battle, and sometimes I forget who the battle belongs to... I know the war is over, it's already been won, I KNOW all this stuff... But when you're in the valley and already feeling low, sometimes it's easier to believe the lies. Not that I'm trying to make excuses for myself, I know for a fact that it is true for other people too.

Anyways, my point I'm trying to make is that when I get so exhausted like that, it intensifies those voices that tell me I'm not worth it, I'm no good, trying to drag me down. I'm reminded of times when I've failed, when I've let other people down, when I "wasn't good." I'm not at the point yet, and I know I need to make it so that I DON'T get to that point, cuz that point sucks =(

There is a happy ending to this post though! =) Today was a good day! I left the house this morning to go somewhere other than work, and it felt so good!!! =D That really set my mood for my entire day, I felt in such a lighter mood than I felt all week, and when things happened that sucked (like the kitchen flooding at Smitty's today cuz of plugged up plumbing...), I wasn'tbothered by it, I just did what I had to do (for the flooded kitchen, I simply just mopped it up, no big deal lol) When I got home, I was a bit disappointed that there were a bunch of people here (cuz I just wanted to veg around...), but I just went upstairs and played some video games - beat the game I was playing even!

Anyways, I need to get to bed cuz I have to be up in like, 7 hours for work, so I'll finish this off... I know I need to work out a better work schedule, maybe even asking to not work either Saturday or Sunday at Smitty's... At least at the daycare, there's some routine I'm starting to get used to, so I don't wanna take a day off from that, cuz at least a routine schedule becomes easier to handle... I'll have to have a sit-down with my kitchen manager... Please keep me in your prayers, this week is gonna be another long week because I have even MORE shifts at Smitty's, PLUS getting ready for childcare for in-Sunday next week at CFOT... All the activities are all prepped and ready to go, but I still haven't actually watched the DVD part yet.

Random note: I just realised how often I use "..." LOL! Goodnight world! =)

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Book List 2010

I was gonna write an entry to vent my frustrations of late, but I've changed my mind... As I opened Blogger to make a post, I saw my friend Alison's post about her book list for 2010 on the side, and it reminded me that I wanted to make a list too!!! So here goes... As I read them I will italicise them, and when I'm finished them I will cross them out! =)

PS, these are all books that I have that I haven't read yet...

1) www:wake by Robert J. Sawyer
2) Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom
3) Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
4) Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
5) The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne
6) Redemption by Karen Kingsbury
7) Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson
8) Pure by Rebecca St. James
9) The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen
10) Forgotten God by Francis Chan
11) The Love Revolution by Joyce Meyer
12) The Furious Longing of God by Brennan Manning
13) The Twenty-Piece Shuffle by Greg Paul
14) Total Abandon by Gary Witherall
15) Hope Again by Charles Swindoll
16) If I Stay by Gayle Forman
17) Purpose for the Pain by Renee Yohe

That last one, Purpose for the Pain, I started reading it when I first got it last year, but I was at a point where I really could not read it, some of it was hitting pretty close, and I could not continue reading it... But please, check out that link, it's a Youtube video of Renee herself explaining the book. While you're at it, check out To Write Love On Her Arm's website! TWLOHA started around Renee, so check out her story, and also what TWLOHA continues to do today!!!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Food Plan

Monday
-Life
-Sidekick noodles, banana, granola bar
-stuffed chicken, steamed asparagus, rice

Tuesday
-Cheerios
-grapes, yogurt and granola
-omelette with peppers and mushrooms (gotta get rid of them!)

Wednesday
-Kashi cereal
-grapes, yogurt and granola
-Pizza Pops

Thursday
-Life
-yogurt and grapes
-pasta

Friday
-Cheerios
-yogurt and grapes, if any left
-eat at work

Saturday
-pancakes
-granola bar
-eat at work

Next week I wanna get my mom's recipe for the soup diet thing she has, and do that... I'll keep you posted! =)

Friday, January 15, 2010

Discipline

I was told by a friend today that I am the second most disciplined person she knows (the first being her sister...) I seriously wish I was that disciplined... My resolutions? Currently the only one I'm really staying on track with is tithing, and somewhat my diet... I have been sticking to my meal plan, making changes when necessary, but I've been still eating a lot of junk food... I had a box of smarties yesterday... I've been eating my mini eggs much too often... And on top of that, I haven't been doing my exercises, nor have I been doing my devotional time... Please pray for me as I try to get back on track with all this.....

Monday, January 11, 2010

Here's Another!

I forgot to mention yesterday exercising as part of my resolutions... haha... mainly forgot to cuz I definitely haven't been doing it... Although I've been walking a little more... getting off the bus a stop early, walking instead of accepting offers of being driven... It's not much, but it IS a start, and I feel good about it =)

As well, yesterday I had toyed with the idea of meal planning... I did sit down yesterday and make this week's schedule, here it is:

Monday:
Breakfast - Kashi cereal
Lunch - Clam chowder, apple, granola bar (ended up not eating the chowder though cuz I was full after the apple and bar lol...)
Dinner - Eat at work (though I ended up not working so I made shredded hashbrowns, bacon, and scrambled eggs at home)

Tuesday:
Breakfast - Life
Lunch - Apple, yogurt with granola
Dinner - Stir-fry (red yellow green peppers, red onion, mushrooms, broccoli)

Wednesday:
Breakfast - Kashi cereal
Lunch - Grapes, granola bar
Dinner - not sure yet... it's pool night so I'd either eat at The Mix (where we're at this week) or make something to bring with me, I'm thinking Chef Boyardee =)

Thursday:
Breakfast - Cheerios
Lunch - Banana, yogurt with granola
Dinner - Eat at work

Friday:
Breakfast - Life
Lunch - Grapes, yogurt with granola
Dinner - Left-over stir-fry

Saturday:
Breakfast - Waffles and bacon
Lunch - Granola bar, banana
Dinner - Eat at work

Tuesday-Sunday lunches will be light because I don't work until 1:30, and therefore will sleep in, therefore not needing a big lunch like on Mondays, when I work 8-5 split shift... Of course, I realise that I get hungry in the evening, like around 8 or 9, so I bought healthy snacks! Breton crackers (actually, the no-name brand...), nuts, not to mention all the fruits/veggies/granola bars/yogurt I have now, goodness!!! Today went well, I stuck to my planner, it feels good! =) Now the only problem is that I have a lot of Smarties kickin around LOL! I bought a package of them for pool nights, and then got a big tin of the little boxes for Christmas... So I'm trying to resist eating them all up at once, but pacing myself... Yes, I'm still gonna eat them, I'm not just gonna get rid of them LOL! But moderation is definitely key!!!

That's all for now I suppose! =)

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Good Explanation!

Do you ever get into a conversation with someone about God, and they claim that God cannot possibly exist because if He did, He wouldn't allow so much pain and suffering in the world? I was going through my saved emails tonight, and I found a forwarded story that I'd like to share here...

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed. As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation. They talked about so many things and variouss subjects. When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said, "I don't believe that God exists." "Why do you say that?" asked the customer. "Well, you just have to go out in the street to realise that God doesn't exist. Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things." The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument. The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.

Just after he left the barber shop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkept. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber, "You know what? Barbers do not exist." "How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber. "I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!" "No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside." "Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is, peopel do not come to me." "Exactly!" affirmed the customer. "That's the point! God, too, DOES exist! What happens is, people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."

Resolutions So Far...

Okay, so I've failed pretty hard at some of my resolutions lol... But I've done really well with others, so that's good!

First of all, spiritual discipline... I was doing fairly well the first few days, but then Wednesday and Thursday were late nights, and so I skipped those days, and then never went back... So I really need to get caught up on that... I've been tithing too, I've decided that! Except I may only tithe every second week, because that's when I get paid... And I do want to tithe 10% of my income, so when I stop at the bank to deposit my Smitty's cheque every other week, then I can take out 10% of that, PLUS the 10% from my daycare money, which is automatically deposited...

Secondly, healthy eating... Not so well done... In fact, when I went grocery shopping this week, I bought a big bag of Cadbry Mini Eggs...... =/ Although I also bought plenty of fruits and veggies and granola/yogurt bars for lunches! Tomorrow I'm gonna bring clam chowder (mmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!), a granola bar, and an apple. And of course, my water bottle! =) I've been drinking a LOT of water lately, mainly because it is QUITE dry in the daycare, but the fact that I'm actually remembering to drink my water is progress, because usually I just don't lol...

I've been more intentional with what I make for dinners too! Last week, I actually took a picture of my supper, cuz it looked so yummy!!! I'll post it up with this blog entry! It was stuffed chicken breast (broccoli and cheese, yummo!), edamame, and whole wheat couscous with cajun spice! Breakfasts have been a bit better too! I bought mostly healthy cereals LOL regular Cheerios, Life, Kashi "Honey, Almond, and Flax Flavoured" cereal (oh my gosh definitely the best healthy cereal ever, but a bit expensive!), but I couldn't pass up on another box of Lucky Charms... Those are my ultimate favourite cereal, so I'll have to work on cutting that out totally... =)

I've been thinking of planning out my meals like my friend Alison does... Not to save on food costs, but to actually map out my meals rather than snacking all day... I think after I post this, I will do that........ =)

Friday, January 1, 2010

Discipline Is an Art?

I ususally don't make New Year's resolutions, mainly because I usually fail within the first week and give up lol... But this year, I've decided that I need to be more disciplined in many areas of my life, and what a better time to start than the new year... So here's my thoughts:

First and foremost, I need to be more disciplined in my devotional time. Up til now, my devotional time hasn't really existed, and I wanna change that... I have so many devotional books, some are 40 days, some are a year... I don't wanna do them all at once lol that'd be crazy and a sure way to fail... But I have "The Message//Remix: Solo", which is a year long devotional study using the Message version of the Bible, I'm pretty psyched about this one!

Secondly, I want to be more disciplined in my eating habits. I've been eating a LOT of junk food lately, and not very many fruits and veggies... For example, for breakfast every morning I always have a sugary cereal; every shift I work at Smitty's I have a box of Smarties and an energy drink; I munch munch munch when I'm at home... I have gained some weight, not very much, but if I keep eating like this it will end up being a lot...

Thirdly, to go along with the healthier eating, I want to be more active... When I'm not working, I'm usually at home lounging on the futon playing on my laptop (munching). That's another factor in my weight gain lol... If I was more of a morning person, I'd be out at like 8am to take a jog around the block... Buuuuuut I'm definitely not a morning person... And it's winter... And if I'm already making excuses before even starting on my resolutions, then I've already failed... Sigh... But I've decided that I can just do fitness stuff at home! I've thought about setting aside at least half an hour every day to do some crunches (to help get rid of some of that weight around my belly =P), push-ups (cuz I don't have a lot of upper body strength...), some yoga (cuz I LOVE yoga! =D), etc... I definitely miss the Wii Fit... =(

I read somewhere that it takes at least 6 weeks to break a habit... So I know I'm not gonna succeed every single day, I know that... And just knowing that will make it less disappointing (and wanting to just give up...) when I do fail... But that doesn't mean I won't still give it my all!!! =)